Show & Tell

"Some behavioural scientists say our new collective aversion to things like standing too close together was drilled into us quickly as the COVID-19 outbreak spread around the globe and into our communities – we have been conditioned to think of these behaviours as dangerous, and for many people that now triggers anxiety, anger or fear when they see them, even if it is only in a show or movie."

--Today's news

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Dear Kate,

Last night I slept very badly.  That's what happened to my mother-in-law the night before.  The link between the two is that I took her to T&T yesterday.

It was my off day, and she has been begging everyone to take her to shop on her own.  So with face mask on and sanitizer handy, boldly we went.

No, she didn't get on my nerves, what my sister-in-law claimed her mom was gleefully doing to her (as a payback, of course), because not only I didn't make my nerves available, but also mom has seen my nerves rebuking her WeChat behavior, especially when involving me as a recipient.  And it also helped that she thought I am smart.

I put the mask on her and, ah, it was inside out.

It was like a reality show.  Long line-up, physical distancing, had a gun pointed at our heads to check for fever, couldn't find a cart and ended up pulling 3 trolley crates, long line-up again checking out, had the lady behind yelling at us racial slur because we were moving too slow and thus no doubt from a different planet.  Then I drove around town to pick up stuff, trying not to get lost or have the frozen animals die on me.  Went home, mowed the lawn, vacuumed the house, in and out of a few other things in between, and at the end of it all decided to go to bed early.

To stare at the ceiling of my mind for hours.

It's a stressful time for many.  Another 10 hours of work today for me and that's the easy part.

People want to spit out their frustration and defeat, sometimes by spitting on the money before giving to the cashier, sometimes on the elevator buttons, sometimes on the Uber driver, or even the face of some three-year-old girl.  Happening here and everywhere.  Bad wars getting worse, divisions growing deeper, human nature going viral.

We are now tapping into our narrative bank account, withdrawing stuffs we've been gathering all our life, for a time such as this, in defeat and frustration, sickness and--sooner or later and most dependably--dying.

This is no longer a show.  This is real.

Yours, Alex