While at a Party

Who knows? Who has seen this before? Even when she wondered what sort of tea that they gave you at Kew, he felt that something looked up behind her words, and stood vast and solid behind them; and the most very slowly rose and uncovered - O, Heavens, what were those shapes? - little white tables, and the waitresses who looked first at her and then him; and there was a bill that he would pay with a real two-shilling piece, and it was real, all real, he assured himself, fingering the coin in his pocket, real to everyone except to him and to her; even to him it began to seem real; and then - but it was too exciting to stand and think any longer, and he pulled the parasol out of the earth with a jerk and was impatient to find the place where one had tea with other people, like other people.

“Kew Gardens” by Virginia Woolf, 1943

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Dear Alex,

One of the most curious sights for a woman at a party among tea and tables is to see another wearing her exact dress. Identical copies in color and cut.

But the character of the dress, its creases, hemline and shape, exudes in crisp contrast the characters of both women. These differences in fabric and skin matter - the more nuanced and imaginative, the greater her gap of concern over seeing someone in her dress.

This unsettling notion may not solely spring from envy in the crude, silent question: Who looks or feels more beautiful in the dress? It may have nothing to do with fitting or fits of emotion at all.

Then what is it in the woman which draws concern over the emergence of the same outfit on a special occasion? What is it really about?

To this curiosity, Ravi Zacharias, legendary defender of the Christian faith in flesh and flashes of truth, undresses the mystery of an ancient debate in this brief video clip.  Free will vs. determinism. Is woman or man free to choose? Or does your decision come from pre-designed molds and cookie-cutters that direct your thoughts and actions? Are you puppet roped to fate or player in the park with liberty?

Free to choose a dress, a dream, love or dread with other people, like other people.

So for a woman, what is the root concern over the look and feel of someone wearing the same dress at a party? Beyond the confines in costume, cosmetics and contest, could it be that we want the same outfitting of goodness and grace? And in this explicit theater, could it be that you and I see more similarities than illusions in our desire to dress ourselves in the same truth?

Is it possible that from the start, my dress is not even mine to own or keep? And now looking at the same form and design on her and you as beings of free will, should we be concerned about the anatomy and undressing of our choices?

Yours, Kate